I started using alcohol at age 15 and it felt like the perfect solution to my childhood trauma and dysfunctional home life. My values changed almost immediately, and I went from having LDS background to the other end of the spectrum. I got a DUI when I was 16 and many underage alcohol misdemeanors. I was kicked out of high school and was ashamed that I had a GED and not a high school diploma. I was pregnant at age 18 and was able to stop drinking but started again shortly after my daughter was born. I didn’t have any more legal consequences after that first DUI, mostly because of luck. My biggest consequence from drinking was that it stunted my growth as a human being.
My recovery from alcohol has really been about recovering from the reasons why I drank, which I can address now that I am not drinking. My threshold for being unhappy was fairly low, in comparison to others’ stories. This is not to undermine or deny what I went through. I had withdrawal symptoms from alcohol, shitty relationships, and no sense of self. When people in AA say, “If I drink, I will die,” I don’t entirely relate. If I drink, I may die eventually and my disease will continue to progress, but more likely, I will be miserable in my existence. I won’t achieve my purpose, be connected to a higher power, or have fulfilling relationships. I have learned that my addiction to alcohol is a symptom of trauma, and drinking was merely a coping skill. Alcohol worked very well to numb my pain and it helped me disassociate. I didn’t even know I was disassociating until I started my recovery journey. It becomes more and more apparent that I didn’t know how to cope with my feelings or know how to be comfortable in my skin.
My personal work and successes have been on self-forgiveness and love, forgiving others, learning healthy boundaries, and being the best mother possible. I am in recovery from alcohol and co-dependency. I am learning how to feel my feelings, cope with life, and stand up for myself and my worth. I live in Idaho, and I am a single mom to 3 amazing, beautiful daughters. I am so proud of myself for breaking the intergenerational patterns in my family.
My curiosity about sobriety started about 3 years ago. I started listening to podcasts in the beginning of my recovery and found The SHAIR Podcast with Omar Pinto. I loved his voice and his energy. I have found his interviews to have a profound impact on my ability to see my addiction as an opportunity and not a dirty secret. I eventually became a member of his FB group and then joined the SRC where I have connected with so many amazing people in recovery. I feel the SRC group has kept me sober.
I can access meetings via Zoom which has been crucial to me since I am at home with my kids and haven’t found an AA group in my community where I feel connected. The connection with others in the group has saved me from loneliness and isolation. I have found a sponsor in one of these groups who was willing to complete the 12 steps with me which has been transformational! I am almost 5 months in my recovery from alcohol and 95% of the time, I don’t even think about drinking. I am so grateful for the SRC, the SHAIR podcast, my sponsor, the step work, and online recovery.
How can we be resilient in the face of addiction, physical issues, and mental challenges when it feels impossible to get out?
How do we keep a positive mindset when time after time, life throws us crises?
If you’ve ever thought, “I don’t know if can do this … I don’t know if I can get through this … I don’t know if I can overcome …” this interview is for you.
Today we have Brian R. King on The SHAIR Podcast. He grew up with undiagnosed ADHD and Dyslexia, struggled with obesity, lived through cancer, became the father of 3 sons who also have Asperger’s and ADHD, and is now coping with Multiple Sclerosis.
Anyone would understand if Brian felt sorry for himself, but instead, he’s living life to the fullest. Brian is a true inspiration to anyone undergoing extreme adversity. Listen to what it means to live fully regardless of your challenges.
Brian R. King, MSW grew up with undiagnosed ADHD and Dyslexia. Being mercilessly bullied by peers and some teachers, he grew up believing he was worthless.
It wasn’t until high school that Brian discovered his sense of humor and a small group of friends to see him through those years. The ride was about to become far more complicated.
Brian’s graduation present from high school was Stage 3 testicular cancer.
He spent the summer in chemotherapy fighting for his life and his sanity as he lived in virtual isolation trying to make sense of what was happening.
After learning his cancer was in remission, Brian declared that he would live a life of purpose. A life where he wasn’t ruled by anger, helplessness and bitterness. But one of conscience, compassion and social responsibility.
Brian got married, earned his Master’s Degree in Social Work and became the father of three sons. Sons who subsequently were diagnosed with Asperger’s and ADHD. Brian received his own diagnoses of ADHD and Dyslexia not long after.
Brian realized he needed to become the father his sons required him to be. So he committed to learning all he could to understand his own challenges and the challenges of his sons. He knew he needed to model the very skills his sons would need to succeed in this world. He wanted to make sure they were prepared to live as fully as possible.
One day, his wife, the mother of his children decided to leave. For a time, Brian was a single father to three special needs sons. With the help of family he was able to relocate and help his sons move forward. He remarried and started a new life.
In wasn’t long after that a series of unexplained symptoms began cropping up that resulted in pain, fatigue, increased difficulty walking and a host of other issues.
Brian finally received an answer with a diagnosis of Multiple Sclerosis. After coming to terms with this reality, Brian remembered his commitment to modeling for his sons what it means to live fully regardless of your challenges.
Brian says frequently, “My boys are watching me live my life. I don’t want them to see helplessness and hear excuses. I want them to see positivity, resilience and resourcefulness.”
You’d be hard pressed to meet someone who can teach you so much about what it means to be human, with a generous spirit, no matter what life brings.
Brian has managed to write 5 books and give dozens of presentations throughout the world on the topics of Parenting and Educating children with ADHD, parenting and mindset.
His present focus is on teaching women with ADHD how to live life on their own terms for the benefit of every life they will go on to touch.